For most parents, trying to get their children to follow their instructions is like pulling teeth—it can be done but no one likes the process. Sometimes parents rely on techniques that do not readily work but are used because that was how the person was raised.
They figure that if it worked for the parent when she was younger, why are they not working now? The truth is that they did not really work then but that was all that anyone tried.
Parents have learned that yelling and nagging their children does not work so well and, therefore, new techniques must be tried. Fortunately, there are many techniques available to make life easier for the parent.
The Best Ways to Encourage Your Child Without Nagging
Below, are the best ways to encourage your child without nagging involved:
Mental Jiu-Jitsu Techniques
A basic self-defense technique is to use the force of the person against them. This can be applied to dealing with people in order to get them to do what you want.
After all, everyone has a motivation for what they do. Understanding that motivation makes it easier to get that person to do what you want them to do. This means that you need to first understand where the other person is coming from and then allowing for that.
With children, this generally means that they are motivated to learn how things work and they like answering questions as it allows them to show that they understand how things work. They are also usually motivated by fairness; as long as you play by the rules so will they.
This means that if you play by the rules and make sure that the child understands what is going on, you do not need to nag. While this does not mean you need to explain everything that you tell the child to do, it does mean that you should at least try to explain your reasoning every so often, especially if it is something that the child does not want to do.
Also, remember to be consistent. If you are doing something differently, make sure that you explain why you are doing it differently. This last will help you avoid confusion and the kid may actually get behind it just to see if things run differently, or at least a little smoother.
Finding Ways to Motivate Using Love
Kids love to try new things, especially when it has quick returns. This is why it is well worth looking into kids music classes. Not only do music classes give kids a chance to learn new skills, but they can hear the results as soon as they begin to play.
In a way, this is also why kids like to clean; they can see that their efforts are having an effect on their environment almost immediately. However, you need to remember that if you associate the chore with drudgery and that it is a punishment, they will learn to dread doing it.
If you show them how to have fun doing chores, even if it is something as simple as playing music in the background followed by some playtime after, then the child will learn to love doing chores.
Problem Solving and Emotional Investment
Problem-solving is another method to use that avoids nagging. Again, kids love to show off how smart they are and they are innately curious. Asking the child how she would solve the problem brings both of those motivations into the situation.
Also, since the child helped solve the problem, she is also invested in seeing what happens and will be curious as to what happens. Asking them for advice is a great way to not only involve them but also to motivate them to see things through. It is a simple solution, but it gets them interested and builds their self-confidence as well.
Keep in mind that these techniques are not for every situation. Sometimes you will need to be more direct, and that should be seen as fine. Different situations require different solutions, after all.
However, taking the time to explain what is going on, getting the child involved, and making the situation enjoyable are great ways to not only ensure compliance but will also help to build self-confidence.
Throw in some meditation time for yourself in order to ensure that you are approaching the situation with a clear head, and you will find that these tips will help out.