A divorce is never easy, but that doesn’t mean you can’t get through it successfully. Yes, you’ll never be the same person again but chances are, you will become stronger and wiser. You just need help dealing with all the trouble, from financial problems to managing your mental health and we’ve got your back here.
We’ve consulted the experts from Survive Divorce – a web platform for getting support during divorce – and asked for some helpful information. If you don’t know how to explain the situation to your children, where to find the money, or how to get through the legal process, read on. These 10 empathetic tips will help you make it through a divorce with minimum struggle.
Life Doesn’t End Here: 10 Empathetic Tips for Getting Through a Divorce
Take Care of Yourself
You’re probably used to keeping everyone else’s needs in mind, so it’s hard to think about your own needs. You may be feeling vulnerable and broken, but you still need to take care of yourself. Dr. Alexandra Solomon says that it’s the best way to get through a divorce.
You should make sure that you are eating well and regularly exercising. Don’t deprive yourself of sleep and do everything you can to make sure you don’t fall ill.
That’s because your physical health affects your mental health. So if you feel weak and depressed, you’ll find it harder to deal with the divorce. If you find yourself falling into depression you should talk to your doctor and friends and they will help you get through it.
Your Children Come First
As a parent, you always put your children first but during a divorce, that may change. The experts from Survive Divorce say that you need to make sure they’re alright too. If they’re old enough, they may want to know why their parents are getting divorced. You may also face some trouble with schoolwork or behavior problems. It might even get worse when the other parent starts dating someone new.
The first thing you need to do is explain the divorce situation in simple terms. You can use the word “divorce”, but only when your child asks about it. Otherwise, you should stick to “separating” instead of “getting separated” or “getting a divorce”. This will make it easier for your child to understand what happened. Remember that they are still little and should be protected from the negative emotions surrounding the divorce.
Everyone Is Different
You can’t expect a neat transition from married life to single life and this is especially true if you have kids. In fact, there’s no such thing as a perfect time to go through a divorce. The only thing that matters is how you deal with it. So, don’t try to find solutions from other people, because everyone has very different experiences with divorce.
The best thing to do is talk with friends as they will provide emotional support and help you sort out your feelings. Don’t forget that no one really understands what you’re going through unless they have been in your shoes.
Be Realistic About Your Financial Situation
Divorce is costly and not just in the emotional sense. You may have to spend more money now than you have before, especially on lawyers and child support. However, this doesn’t mean that you should postpone your plans, after all, every day is important for you and your children.
If you were planning on traveling somewhere nice, don’t cancel it because of financial reasons. It might sound odd, but at least spending some money will make you feel better about yourself and help you feel relaxed.
Don’t Wait to Make the First Steps
You don’t want things to end badly between the two of you but if the other person refuses to talk things out, you should let them go. It’s crucial that both of you do everything possible to protect your children from the stress of divorce so they can lead normal lives.
Even though sometimes the other parent might not be mature enough to do that. Yes, it’s frustrating to hear endless complaints and accusations but it’s even worse when that person refuses to work things out with you. So if that’s the case, don’t wait for them and start making plans for the future now!
Don’t Forget About Yourself
When your spouse leaves and takes your kids with him or her, it feels like a part of you is gone forever too. This may seem selfish, but it’s not wrong to focus on yourself sometimes during a divorce.
Especially when everyone else is busy fighting for custody rights and dividing assets. Just remember that it’s normal to feel overwhelmed by this entire experience, but if something makes you cringe or triggers bad memories, don’t try to handle it alone! Reach out for help right away!
During a divorce, it’s easy for emotions to bubble up, even if both of you are trying to be reasonable and fair about everything. Still, it’s important for both parties that things don’t get heated too much (or at least, not too often). The reason is quite simple, lawyers tend to charge higher fees when dealing with emotionally charged cases and that means more money out of your pocket!
So if your ex-spouse starts yelling at you during a phone call or text message, try not to respond. Just hang up and calm down before responding again (if necessary). That way, you’ll save yourself from trouble later on!
Never Give Up Hope
It’s hard not being able to see your kids whenever you want, not to mention the fact that your ex-spouse doesn’t want anything to do with you anymore. It’s important to remember in these situations that you shouldn’t give up hope!
As hard as this may seem now, there will come a day when everything will be alright again, especially if you follow these tips and get support from others who have been through similar situations! Just be sure to take care of yourself and your kids, and you’ll be fine!
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
Divorce is hard on both parties but that doesn’t mean you should bear the burden alone. And if you ask for help, you’ll be surprised how many people want to be there for you. So don’t be afraid of asking!
The one thing you shouldn’t do is ask for help from your ex because it will make things even worse. Instead of turning to your ex-spouse, look for family members or friends who are willing to listen. If you don’t have anyone you consider close enough to confide in you can always join a support group or find a therapist!
Sometimes everything might seem overwhelming and impossible to handle but trust us, it’s not as bad as it seems. In fact, according to Dr. Alexandra Solomon, divorce can be seen as an opportunity to start over and rebuild your life from scratch.
After going through this experience, you’ll be much stronger and wiser! Just remember, you need patience and passion to get through the divorce but when it’s all over you’ll feel much better about yourself and your life. So remember, the key to success lies in your hands!
Divorce is something that many couples go through, in fact, almost half of marriages end up in divorce. So I think it’s clear to see, you are not alone in your struggle. It can be a really rough time for all parties involved. Not only can it be emotionally hard, but it can really hit your wallet too.
That’s why it’s so important that you also take care of yourself and the people who are dearest to you at this tough time. If you feel that you are struggling mentally, there are so many support groups out there filled with people going through the same thing.
These support groups are a great source of comfort for people who are struggling with divorce because everyone in the group is going through the same thing. Not only will you meet people who can support you emotionally but they can also offer you advice. Remember, divorce isn’t the end, it’s just the beginning of your brand new life!